I have never counted down the days to Christmas in this manner or had one of my own, so I had to do some research. I noticed that some of the Advent Calendars had candy or gifts for each day, and others had a daily activity written on them. I really liked this type of calendar. Kevin is a “quality time” child and it was a good way to do that. He was always excited to find out our activity for the day & it was a bonus that it was also a good exercise for him to practice reading aloud. It was also a way to add more structure & discipline to our evenings. He knew that he needed to eat his dinner & be respectful so that we could do our daily activity. Rocky has been traveling a little more often lately, so it was a good way to keep busy with the kids while he was TDY. Some of the activity cards were geared toward helping others or giving, others told him to open a little gift {Swedish Fish or a small pack of Jelly Beans}. I used the birdseed favor from a wedding I photographed and we made a mini DIY bird feeder {one of our favorites}.

I wanted to design something that could be in plain sight of our home {match our existing Christmas decor} & that was large enough for my eclectic supplies. I ended up stealing the embroidery hoop filled with corkboard {my version of a memo board} from my home office & haven’t returned it yet! I used little odds & ends that I already had, sometimes borrowing from other pieces in the house. It was fun to make some of the ornaments & assemble this surprise for Kevin. Designing & creating this non-traditional Advent Calendar was a good pick-me-up for December & it was a fun way to help us celebrate Christmas a little bit every day. *

*We didn’t do it everyday & sometimes I copped out with a “let’s read a dollar store Christmas book tonight” card.

Kevin wasn’t particularly excited about writing Christmas cards to deployed soldiers, but I was proud of him for doing it. This is a picture of his daddy {Rocky} from basic training. He has been deployed over Christmas in the past, so it was important to me to do this one. He drew one of them receiving a present & getting “cheered up from it.” The DIY Birdseed Feeder was easier than I expected & pretty cute! Kevin liked making it & playing with the leftover gel {from the gelatin packet}.I made this reindeer ornament with a cookie cutter + sprinkles. Kevin is 5 and Damian {Ocean} is 18 months. Moments like these make my heart swell.

The icing on the cake, was that on Christmas day {after we drove up to see my family in Findlay, Ohio}, we took the boys to ride the Northwest Ohio Railroad Preservation’s Polar Express {NWOR}. It’s a small “magical little train ride around our track decorated with sparkling lights and holiday decorations.” There is a little museum inside & lots of decorated Christmas trees + warm drinks. The staff was so cheerful & even had blankets waiting for us at the train since it was a cold evening. It was probably the best $6 {for all four of us} that we spent on Christmas! The boys had a lot of fun & it was the perfect surprise for them. You can find NWOR on Facebook, follow them for more information about train rides all year long!

Thanks for reading my Christmas flashbacks this weekend! I am really excited to post more weddings & engagements
in February {plus a special little DIY for Valentine’s Day}. Have a good week! ♥

You can read the story from these first pictures on my personal blog, “Sweet Threads.”

Kevin looking up activities on my iPad on Pinterest. Made this ornament from leftover pieces from last year’s winter inspiration shoot.
On Christmas Eve I woke up to the boys using my shoes & pillows for Angry Bird scenes. Birds were flying. It was awesome.The first picture on the left is from Christmas Eve 2011, the one on the right is from 2010. Damian has grown so much… too much.Rocky & I started a little tradition where Rock dresses up as Santa & rings bells outside of Kevin’s window on Christmas Eve. We go outside & check it out, just missing “Santa.” Kevin paused just long enough to give me an obligatory smile before dashing outside. The next picture was his reaction to the cookies & milk being gone Christmas morning.

Hiding behind the kids who are ready to drive up to Grandma’s in Findlay. This year I have a lot of work to do to finally loose the “baby weight” {I pretend it’s still from Damian}. I would love to fit into my jeans again. {Inspiration & advice welcome!}

I took these pictures for Christmas cards {that I never mailed}. Some of you might get a hello & Christmas greeting from us in February.
The sky on Christmas day from the passenger seat… so clear & pretty. A little peek of my office. The rest was a mess during at this time. In my next post I want to share about a brand new tradition we started & what it looked like

Thank you for letting me show you my little family album! I promise February will be filled with a special Valentine DIY & romantic weddings! ♥

A {planned} two hour delay for Kevin.
Tim Horton’s for breakfast.
Gas that was cheaper than the advertised price.
A cheerful Damian.
A tidy little house & clean sheets…
and freshly sharpened pencils.

♥

If that wasn’t enough, I received the pictures from Erin & Pete’s vintage wedding featured in The Knot Ohio’s Spring/Summer 2012 issue! I’m really honored to have their wedding included as a real wedding, but they put together a beautiful & very special event!

Now if only dinner were already finished ♥

There was a large chunk of goodness given to me in 2011.
I met some amazing people, captured beautiful moments, & was very honored to be published in some of the blogs & magazines I have respected & followed for years. I have always believed in our ability as humans to achieve whatever we want when we work hard enough, and I did that.

They aren’t kidding when they say “success comes with a price.” Especially when you have so much to lose if you aren’t careful.

During the second half of last year, I had to come to terms with “that very high price,” and whether I was prepared to keep paying it. I felt the only choice was to slow down & make a turn. Find a better path to the same destination. They say that in order to move forward you shouldn’t look back. I disagree. I think if you going to change direction, you should be encouraged to look both ways before proceeding. Weigh all sides very carefully. At some point I’ll be ready to reflect & share about where I’ve been & how I’ve come to where I am now, but I’m still getting my sea legs & adapting to the new {healthier} habits. The bottom line is that I’m working on staggering my schedule more efficiently and taking much better care of myself & my family.

It’s not very easy to admit that I’ve been going through a difficult time, but this blog has always been so personal {here & here} & if it’s my legacy to the world… I may as well be honest. Even though you’d have been hard pressed to convince me otherwise a few months ago, I’m realizing it wasn’t all bad. I just copied 2,200 pictures & videos {six months’ worth} from my iPhone to my computer and I viewed each one to see so much evidence of my “blessings.” I’m so glad I have all those random, blurry, giggle filled, relaxed moments to cherish. For some reason I’m always afraid of being too optimistic, too upbeat, or God forbid, pretending that anything is better than it really is. I’m slowly learning that I can have an emotionally heart wrenching day, but still find amazing delight in the smallest luxuries…

Fluffy new bath towels.
Husky morning laughs from Damian.
Robin’s egg blue winter skies.
Surprise {homemade} chocolate gelato from my sister.
A little text from someone who cares in a big way.
Listening to Kevin read…

It’s completely possible to have a thankful heart while dealing with the mess of a broken heart.

It’s ok to acknowledge that the struggles & the pain are here… even the Stress that seems to have set up indefinite camp beside my desk. {He even uses my bathroom & I don’t think he washes his hands. He’s got some nerve}. Understanding how thankfulness trumps depression has been the beginning of the difference in me. Instead of putting my painful thoughts on a pedestal, I privately journal them {as recommended by a good friend}. I release them onto paper so that I can clear space in my mind for better thoughts. Although I like to think I’m an artist, I’m not much of a sculptor. Never really got the feel for a chisel & the movements it takes to cut stone into something beautiful, or even legible. {Ok, so I’ve never even tried}. I am fluent in the language of photography. It’s my way of giving myself {and hundreds of others} glimpses into something we’ve experienced that we will never get back. Lately I’ve been ordering more prints for my family & I have realized that I am probably the person who needs the photographs I take the most. They are such good reminders of why my life is bursting to the seams with incredible moments.
My pictures can be remembered for generations, while I let the heartache of the moment be washed away in the evening tide. ♥

I designed this poster with the help of a {free Photoshop} brush set I found on Pinterest by Besotted Brand.
You can read someone’s take of the story behind this quote here {not sure if it’s the original source}.

What I want to remember in stone {from my iPhone}:

Thank you, always, for being supportive & encouraging. In my imperfections, I hope I can encourage someone else.
I think life is so much more splendid when we feel like we aren’t traveling alone. ♥

There are few things I enjoy more than a house that glows with the light of those beautiful twinkling lights…
When the night is so very dark, they shine bravely & bright.

Sitting in this little room, coffee in hand, I still believe wonderful things can happen.
♥

{Photo Credit: Rock Dozier}

After all my wedding albums are completed & orders are finalized, I’ll post the remaining weddings from 2011. I’m so excited about the people I’ve worked with and the wonderful memories I have from this year… can’t wait to share my experiences with you. It’s hard to believe by the time that happens, my little house will be illuminated with Christmas lights. ♥

I keep starting this post over.

There should be some pretty way to eloquently sum up the fascination of marriage & love, but my allergies have left my mind at a loss for a single polished thought.

This week was full of huge milestones for me.
I turned 28.
I had my 7th wedding anniversary.
This baby blog turned 2.

To quote one of my very first posts, “The kindest thing I ever did to myself was get married the day after my birthday.” The closer I get to thirty older I get, the more I appreciate that the focus isn’t on how many candles are on my cake (or where to find so many), but the years Rocky & I have been so fortunate to share together. The life we’ve built. The boys we’ve created. We were always two old souls & even though we married young, it suited us.

My only regret is that I didn’t realize the last seven years would slip by so quickly.

The last two have been especially brief.

When this blog was created, I was an apron clad wife baking elaborate dinners & decorating pretty cakes in my free time. As I became more fluent in the art of photography, that apron began collecting dust. Perhaps I can work on balancing it all a little better this year, especially for the sake of my dear husband {who has become quite adept at cooking for us}. He is a patient man. He definitely deserves a hot meal every once in a while.

This diary started as a way of sharing my images & stories with my friends & family. When I look back I feel a mixture of pride & sympathy toward my earlier work. I wear my posts like tattoos, that are public for the viewing & judging. I include my pictures and hope they mean something to the people I take them for. This little online journal is home to sweet stories & sometimes very honest confessions. It always waits patiently for me to come back & allows me a canvas to hang my art.

Thanks for being such a very big part of it. ♥

Now it’s time for me to work on my emails. This week has not been my finest hour, thanks for your patience!

*Yes, I love Green Day. “Wake Me Up When September Ends”  has particular sentiment since Rocky left for a deployment in September of 08.

**Tonight though, my new favorite song is Willie Nelson’s cover of Coldplay’s “The Scientist” from the new Chipotle ad.
You can listen to the whole version on Spotify for free!

***My first tattoo was a “safe” one, I’d love to do something classic but more ambitious for the next round. I am in love with the look of painterly tattoos.
You can see all my inspiration on my Pinterest board.

After I gave him all my final “goodbyes” & “don’t forgets” I stood back & waited for them to whisk him away.

He took one final look back.

Even though I was standing behind the glass door, I could see straight through those brown eyes. He will be ok.

I feel excited for him but so terrified of moving on to a new season. There will be lots of people to meet & words to read, I know they’ll teach him more than I ever could. There’s a little relief in the fact that he is going to be taken care of. That he will be amazing.
There will be artwork to display, new songs to sing, & sweet tales of his new adventures.

I had to hold back big elephant tears as he lined up inside the school. It reminded me of saying goodbye to Rocky when he left for basic training. We had been married for a year & it was our first goodbye (of many). I wanted to cling to him, but sometimes you do what you have to do.

And let go.

♥

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♥

* You can see more pictures on my family’s personal blog here.

** Pandora played this song, “The Worlds Greatest by Bonnie Prince Billy,” for the first time as I wrote this morning & I can’t stop listening to it.
Much different than the original version.

I want to be a good mom. There just wasn’t a lot of time to really sit down & plan this party, so I entered into the weekend a little frantic. I had one full day set aside to decorate & bake for a party that didn’t have a theme.

There were several ideas. Should we do a traditional Fourth of July party since he was born on the 5th? Maybe it would be a good time to do his first Greek themed party, since his middle name is Achilles & his dad loves Spartacus. Is it too early for Thomas? He’s kind of into playing with his brother’s trains…

Then the mail came. And a very pretty pretty cake stand that I won from Sweet & Saucy Supply arrived.
One look at this lovely yellow beauty, and a concept was born.

Damian is accustomed to listening to Florence & The Machine, Adele, & Bon Iver, but he does know & love one nursery rhyme: If All the Raindrops. This has been a lifesaver since he was less than a month old, we would sing it and watch his tiny mouth open for the chorus, “Standing outside with my mouth open wide… ah ah ah…” Kevin knew that to calm his baby brother down, he needed to hear us sing that. Soon Damian was singing with us & it is one of the most precious memories I have of his infancy. I decided to focus on part of a lyric, lemondrops & gumdrops, for the loose theme of his party. I took the meaning a little whimsical & of my own interpretation, but that made a lot of things come together in a very short amount of time. One stressful day.

I had a lot of help from my family & I can not thank them enough! My sister Abby & her boyfriend Zach made the pom pom tissue balls. My brothers hung the streamers for the photo booth backdrop! I WISH I had a picture of them doing that, it turned out beautiful.

I baked vanilla bean cupcakes & lemon mini cupcakes & my sister frosted the cupcakes. I always kind of wing it with the frosting, since I still have yet to unpack cookbooks {oh my}. You can tell I don’t do a lot of experimental baking anymore.

I love this beautiful 6″ Yellow Hobnail Cake Stand from My Sweet & Saucy Supply that I won for commenting on their Facebook Page! It came just in time.

I found the cupcake liners at Jo Ann Fabrics along with a slew of cute new goodies from Martha Stewart. It was hard to decide which ones to select.

In retrospect, I would have loved to devote time for crafts ahead of time.
I would have enjoyed gluing the rope into the word “one” instead of burning my fingers in haste.

I made a bean salsa & used the cans to make a toss game. I used wrapping paper scraps & wooden stars leftover from a previous project.

As I mentioned a few posts ago, Damian was not himself during his party & ended up in the ER two days later.
I am so happy to see some very happy moments shine through…

You may notice this little Thomas on his plate. His big brother “gifted” it to him just before he ate his cake. It was a very sweet moment because I know how much Kevin loves those trains & what it meant for him to “give” it to Damian. I missed photographing it of course.

His signal when he’s eaten enough:

I was in heaven when I found these classic toys at Target on clearance for half the original price.Rocky worked so hard to help set everything up & pick up food for the party. This was definitely a “we did it” picture.

Damian’s cousin Nathaniel just turned one too & loved the balloons.

As the sun set, we brought out baby jar containers for catching fireflies. Definitely a hit with the older kids.

It’s very bittersweet to say goodbye to Damian’s baby days. In some ways I’ve known him all my life, in others it went entirely too fast. I’m so thankful for this past year & all the joy that he has brought us. For being able to be together & grow so close as a little family. When he used to wake up at night for feedings, I was so happy for extra time to hold him & cuddle with such a tiny new friend. I tried so hard not to take any of it for granted, because I knew how quickly Kevin grew up.  As I see him grow to look more like his Dad & admire his big brother, I know even better days are ahead.

Perhaps I’m biased because he so openly & affectionately loves me, but I just can’t think of a more perfect way to spend my life. ♥

No matter what we do to fix up this darling old house, the three “mans” I share it with are definitely the very best part. ♥

{Although my pretty little corner office isn’t so bad}.